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Open Letter
Saturday, July 30, 2011
To tell You the truth, I'm scared of my fall term. Mom, found her job that she was looking for and I am thankful. We've been discussing that for a while. And I am thankful. She said that I can now quit my job and concentrate on my studies so I can take more than 3 subjects per term. I can't take more than 4 subjects because that's too much for a working student like me. Fall term starts on September 7th and they will end on November 23rd. I don't want to quit work because I can't depend on them all the time. As I've made my intention clear last year, I wanted to help Mom and Dad alleviate some of the expenses. I want to work because I also have some things I want to buy. Even though I can apply for a student loan, I plan to save money for the future. As I was reviewing my schedule for the fall term, I noticed that it's almost identical to last year's schedule. But I only have one Math subject on the winter term. And I'm planning to take subjects for spring of 2012 as well. My computer course is every Wednesday, 6-9pm. Lab is on Friday. I work in the evenings. I will be spending more time away from home in the evenings. And I'm just realizing that I will only have one day of rest, Sunday. I will be either at school or at work from Monday to Saturday. Despite the rest on Sundays, I won't be home neither. Still I thought to myself that it'll only be for 12 weeks. I was given an option in my head that I could drop that computer course because computer courses are hard. But I believe that I need that course. If I drop that subject, I can gain a day off. But if I dropped the subject, that would prolong my study even further to a year. I remembered what my mom said, after I registered my subjects, she asked me if I could handle my load. What did she mean by that? I said I would handle it, because I want to graduate. She was concerned, I think. I know it's hard. But I feel that if I take this subject off, I'd be making a mistake. I'd be wasting the time. And if I finish this subject and pass it, it would a huge achievement. With You, anything is possible. I don't know where to start thanking You. After what happened last year, I want to experience You again. I didn't want to drop it because I want to put my faith in You. I want to find out what You have for me, the best things that You've laid for me. I know it's going to be a lot of work, I know it's going to be really hard, I know it's going to be really exhausting. But I want to experience You because, in You, there is wholeness of joy. There's so much I can gain from You. Even though I'm scared, even though I really don't know what will happen to me this year, I am excited to find out what You have planned for me. I ask for Your wisdom this year, my God. I bring You back the glory. I am very grateful. I really don't know where I should start thanking You. This is my solemn prayer. And also an open letter. In Jesus Christ's name, Amen. |
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